Hello?Hello!
We are unable to answer the phone until we know why you are calling.
Please listen to the following menu as our options have changed.
This call may be recorded for training purposes.
If you are looking for money, hang up and get a job.
If you are a robot, hang up and push your self destruct button.
If you are AI, reformat and wipe your drive.
If you are ET, call home, your mother wants to talk to you.
If you have reached this number by mistake, please check the number and try your call again.
If you would like to leave a message, you may begin.
If you are a human stay on the line and your call will be answered in the order that it
Your wait time depends on your attitude.
was received.
